The Honeymoon's Over/Script

Written by: Brad Kern

Season 3, Episode 01

Episode Number: 45

[Scene: Attic. Prue is sitting on the floor looking through the Book of Shadows. The camera looks at a dolls, and a teddy bear. The cuckoo clock cuckoo’s. Prue gasps. It’s 2 in the morning. She looks back at the book. The door behind Prue slams open and it’s Phoebe. Prue uses her power to send Phoebe (not knowing it’s her) flying on an old bed.]

Phoebe: Ahhh. (The old bed tumbles over.) Oh. Prue: Oh. Oh god. (She goes to help Phoebe stand up.) Phoebe, I didn’t realize you were home. Are you OK?

Phoebe: Yes.

Prue: I’m sorry. Are you alright?

Phoebe: I’m fine. (Phoebe stands up.) Uh, feeling a little jumpy are we? Prue: Well, yeah. Especially now that we know the evil triad is behind all those attacks.

Phoebe: Um, yeah. I don’t need a recap, but what I do need... is some heat. Is it freezing in here? Did you forget to pay the gas bill?

Prue: I… thought that you were supposed to pay the gas bill. Phoebe: No, Prue. I was going to take care of the club and you were going to take care of the house. Remember? When school started back up for me?

Prue: Oh, right. Uh, I’ll call the gas company first thing. I will be so glad when Piper gets back.

Phoebe: What if she doesn’t? (A phone rings.)

Prue: Uh, that’s my fax. (She goes to get it.) Doesn’t what? (Phoebe puts her purse on.) Phoebe: Wh-what if she doesn’t come back? (Prue picks up the Book of Shadows.) I mean, what if when her and Leo orbed out, it was for good?

Prue: Phoebe, that is ridiculous. (Prue leaves. Phoebe follows.) Phoebe: No Prue. It’s not ridiculous. Think about it. We have not heard from her in a month. And that’s not like her.

Prue: All right. Look, Piper is not going to just ditch us, okay? We’re her sisters and neither is Leo. He’s our white-lighter too.

(They get to the second floor.)

Phoebe: Then why hasn’t she contacted us? I mean, she has to know that we’re worried about her. She also has to know that she’s left us one sister short in the power of three. (They walk downstairs.) So, while she is up romping around the clouds with Leo, we’ve got our wiccan butts flapping around in the wind here. I mean, we are very lucky, Prue, that we have not been attacked yet.

(Prue stops at the end of the stairs.)

Prue: No. It has absolutely nothing to do with luck. The triad is up to something. We just don’t know what it is yet. Phoebe: That’s exactly my point. Piper knows this. So where the hell is she?

Prue: Well, that’s why I’ve been studying the book.

Phoebe: Prue, studying the book is not going to do it. We’re screwed without Piper and you know this. Why aren’t you worried?

Prue: I am worried. Alright? I am scared that you’re right, that we’re never going to see her again, and not because she doesn’t want to come back, but because they won’t let her. Because she broke one too many rules. (The phone rings.) Phoebe: Who’s calling us at 2 in the morning? (Prue goes to answer it as Phoebe follows.)

Prue: Probably Darryl. (She answers it.) Hello?

Darryl: Did you get the fax I sent?

Prue: Yeah. I was just about to check it. (She heads for the conservatory with Phoebe following her.) Hold on.

Phoebe: What’s going on? Prue: Darryl’s tracking a murder suspect who he thinks is in league with a demon.

Phoebe: Based on what?

Prue: Based on the fact that the killer carves a demonic symbol into its victim’s forehead. (She gives Phoebe a piece of paper with a photograph of a victim.) An inverted triangle. That and the fact that he magically seems to be invading arrest. (Prue begins looking through the book.)

Phoebe: Looks like a rune to me.

Prue: Yeah. I saw it in here somewhere. (Into the phone) Darryl, is he still at the pier street rave?

[Cut to Darryl. He’s in a club with people dancing. He’s talking on a cell phone. Loud soft music is playing (not love songs). Darryl is looking at a man (Later known as Emilio.)]

Darryl: Yeah, but I think he’s on the move. I don’t think he spotted me yet. He’s heading out the back.

[Cut to Manor. Prue turns a page and sees the same symbol on the forehead of the demon drawn in the book. They’re Guardians. Prue points to him.] Prue: There.

Phoebe: (Reading from the book.) “An opening by which demons known as the guardians steal an innocent soul.”

(Prue looks at her.)

Prue: (Into the phone.) Stay away from him Darryl.

[Cut to Darryl.]

Darryl: And let him kills somebody else? (Emilio goes outside.) I don’t think so.

Prue: No. Listen to me.

[Cut to Manor.]

Prue: These guardians protect they’re mortal killers in exchange for their victim’s souls.

[Cut to Darryl. He leaves the building.]

Prue: You cannot stop him.

Darryl: Listen Prue. I can take care of myself. I gotta call you back. I’m not sure where this guy is.

(Emilio swings down from the top of a pole and knocks Darryl out.)

[Cut to Manor.]

Prue: Darryl?

[Cut to Darryl. Emilio picks up the phone.] Prue: Darryl? (He hangs it up.)

[Cut to Manor. Prue hangs up and walks in the kitchen with Phoebe following.]

Prue: Alright. We’re only uh, 3 minutes away.

Phoebe: What do we do once we get there?

Prue: How about save Darryl’s life? (Prue goes to get her purse.)

Phoebe: No. I mean about the guardian. We don’t even know how to vanquish it.

Prue: Well, the book says you kill it just like you would a vampire, with a stake. (Prue leaves.)

Phoebe: Oh. Okay. (To the ceiling.) Piper, where are you? (She follows Prue.)

[Cut to Darryl. Emilio is kneeling by him. We hear soft chanting. He’s about to strike him. A girl in her early 20s walks by and sees this. She gasps. Emilio sees her and she runs away. He follows her. She bangs on the door. He tries to stake on her, but she ducks and runs the other way. She tries to climb up, but he pulls her down.]

Woman: Please don’t hurt me. (She screams and he kills her. He lies her on the floor.)

[Scene: Inside the building. Prue, wearing a coat, and Phoebe are walking through the crowd.]

[Cut to outside. Emilio carves the triangle into the woman’s forehead as soft chanting is heard. The triangle glows. The guardian is a spirit and rises from Emilio. A dark blue light goes into him. The guardian goes back into Emilio. He walks to Darryl.]

[Cut to Prue and Phoebe. They walk outside and see the woman dead. They then turn around to see Emilio trying to do the same thing to Darryl.]

Phoebe: Darryl. Prue! (Prue uses her power to send Emilio flying on top of a dumpster. They run to check Darryl. The guardian arises from Emilio.) He’s alive.

Prue: Uh, I think I’ve found the guardian. (Phoebe and Prue stand up.)

Phoebe: Okay. Get rid of it.

Prue: Uh, oh.

(Prue uses her power to send a stick into the guardian, but it goes right through him.)

Phoebe: Wait. Didn’t the book say they were just like vampires? Prue: I might have mis-read that part.

Phoebe: I’m sorry? (The guardian picks up the knife.) Okay. The rune. Aim for the rune. (Prue uses her power to send a stick flying into the guardian’s triangle on his forehead. He gets electrocuted and disappears.) Okay, if Piper ever comes back, I am going to kill her.

Opening Credits

[Scene: From before. The police put the woman in a body bag. Phoebe and Prue are with Darryl, who’s awake and being checked by a medical.]

Phoebe: Poor girl.

Medical: Do you feel dizzy at all? Nauseous?

Darryl: No.

Medical: Trouble focusing? Headache?

Darryl: I’m telling you I’m fine. Only thing wounded is my pride. Prue: Is he fine?

Medical: Yeah. Thanks to you guys.

Prue: What do you mean thanks to us?

Medical: Well, you fought off the attacker didn’t you? (Emilio walks towards the police car, staring at Prue and Phoebe with an evil grin on his face.) Isn't that what happened? Prue: Uh, yeah, you know, it wasn't really that big of a deal.

Medical: Well, you saved his life. I think that's a pretty big deal. You're a lucky man, Inspector. Take care.

Darryl: Thanks.

(The medical grabs his bag and walks away.)

Phoebe: Okay, can we go now?

Darryl: No. You have to get witness statements.

Prue: Uh, Darryl...

Darryl: Prue, you're witnesses to a crime. In this case the only witnesses.

Phoebe: No, Darryl, we can't be witnesses. We used our powers to stop the killer, what are we supposed to say?

Prue: And he saw us use them too.

Darryl: Nobody's gonna believe anything that sleaze ball has to say. All you have to do is get your story straight.

Phoebe: You mean get our lies straight.

Darryl: Phoebe, listen to me, without your testimony, Emilio walks.

(Prue looks over at Emilio and he is still grinning at them.)

Prue: What is he smiling at anyway? It's not like he has his guardian demon to protect him anymore.

Phoebe: Yeah, and unfortunately our guardian angel is no where to be found. (She looks up.) We sure could use some cosmic help right now. What are we supposed to do? We've never been in this situation before.

Darryl: You better decide fast. Here comes the ADA.

(A really cute ADA approaches them.)

Cole: Ladies. My name is Cole Turner and I'm the Assistant District Attorney assigned to this case. I was wondering if either of you saw what happened here.

(Phoebe raises her hand.)

Phoebe: I did!

Commercial Break

[Scene: Court Room. Prue and Phoebe are sitting on one the benches. Cole is standing in front of them.]

Cole: I think we’re in good shape except for the, what’d you call the murder weapon? A-a athamee?

Phoebe: Athame. It’s a ceremonial knife used by… (Prue looks at her.) Um, lots of different crazy people.

Cole: And are you sure you didn't see who took it?

Phoebe: No, we were there to check up on Darryl and...

Prue: Probably just some lunatic from the rave. Will it hurt the case?

Cole: The P.D. will try to focus on it but this is just an arraignment, unless there's something I don't know about, we should have more than enough for the judge to hold him over for trial. Don't worry, I'm good at what I do.

(The judge enters the room.)

Bailiff: All rise. Court is now in session. The Honorable Judge William Hamilton now presiding. Please be seated. Phoebe: (to Prue) I'm nervous.

Prue: Oh, you know. Witches and trials. It’s that whole Salem thing.

Phoebe: No. I mean about lying. It just doesn’t feel right, Prue.

Prue: Would it feel more right to just let him go?

Court Clerk: Case number B684400. The state of California versus Emilio Smith. One count of murder in the first degree, one count attempted murder.

(Cole stands up.)

Cole: Assistant District Attorney Cole Turner for the state.

(The P.D. stands up.)

Alan: Public Defender Alan Sloan for the defense.

Judge: How does the defendant plead?

Alan: Not guilty, your Honor.

Judge: So noted. Mr. Turner, I have read your brief, do you have anything to add?

Cole: No, your Honor. The state stands by the arrest report and the eye witness testimonies.

Judge: Mr. Sloan?

Alan: Well, uh, it seems to me, your honor, you can't very well hold for a murder trial without a murder weapon.

Cole: The State has already stipulated that the alleged murder weapon is still outstanding. We have two eyewitnesses who--

Alan: Saw what, exactly? My client bent over the Inspector? That's how they justify the attack? How do they know he didn’t just happen to cross the scene, and was trying to revive the inspector.

Phoebe: Oh, please!

(The judge bangs his mallet.)

Judge: Order! (Cole looks at Phoebe and she mouths 'sorry'.)

Alan: And why, if they were able to so easily able to subdue him, don't they know exactly what happened to the alleged weapon? I mean, what? Did it just poof! magically disappear?

Cole: Objection!

Phoebe: Oh God, he knows.

Prue: Easy.

Cole: Your honor, the witnesses aren't on trial here.

Alan: Why? Isn't perjury illegal?

Cole: Objection, your honor!

Judge: Mr. Turner, unless you have something else or can produce the alleged murder weapon, I'm inclined to agree with Mr. Sloan.

Cole: You're what?

Judge: Do you or don't you have any additional evidence?

Cole: You mean aside the fact that he's the prime suspect in three other murders but no less then five people saw him leave the rave just before the attacks and that everything other than the missing murder weapon makes this in any other courtroom a slam dunk?

Judge: The charges are dropped, the defendant is released.

(He bangs his mallet.)

Cole: I don't believe this.

Bailiff: Clerk, next case.

(Emilio and Alan stand up. Emilio grins at Prue and Phoebe as they walk past them.)

Cole: Yeah, you keep smiling, punk. (Cole grabs his jacket.) I'm not giving up until I see you fry.

Darryl: Come on, Turner, this isn't gonna solve anything.

Alan: (to Emilio) Let's go. Let's go.

(They leave the room.)

Phoebe: (to Cole) I'm so sorry, I wish that there was more that we could do.

Cole: If there's something you're not telling me, anything, if you're afraid of him we can protect you. I can refile.

Prue: Um, we have to go. Sorry.

(They walk away.)

[Scene: Manor. Living room. Prue and Phoebe are there. Prue's looking in the Book Of Shadows.]

Phoebe: We shouldn't have lied.

Prue: Phoebe...

Phoebe: We shouldn't have. We should've told the truth. We should've done whatever we had to do to keep that jerk from walking.

Prue: Like what? Say what really happened to that knife? Tell the court that we're witches?

Phoebe: Why not, Prue? Isn't it more important to keep a killer off the streets then to protect our secret?

Prue: Phoebe, the Judge would've thought that we were nuts and you know it.

Phoebe: Not if you proved it to them and showed them your power.

Prue: No, that wouldn't have put Emilio away, that would've put us away, and then we would never have the chance of catching him again.

Phoebe: And would that be before or after he kills somebody else? I'm sorry, you know I'm just really frustrated about all this. What about that public defender? I mean, if Emilio really did tell that P.D. about us, then why didn't he spill the magic beans?

Prue: Same reason as us, credibility. What I'm curious about is, is he mortal or is he demon?

Phoebe: All I know is Cole is an angel. He was awesome in that court room yesterday.

Prue: See something you like, sis?

Phoebe: Maybe, or maybe it's just nice to run into someone that's not a college boy. More years, less hormones.

Prue: Yeah, not a bad butt either.

(Piper and Leo orb in.)

Piper: We’ve been through this, Leo. I don’t care if they are. It’s not right and it’s not fair.

Leo: I know that, but it’s their rules.

Piper: Screw their rules. They’re wrong.

Prue: Piper… Piper: Just a second. Leo, you better do something about this because this is not acceptable.

Leo: Piper, come on.

Piper: Oh. (She freezes him.) I’m gonna go to the club. Do not tell him.

(She leaves.)

Prue: Hi, welcome home!

Phoebe: Okay, what was that all about? I didn’t even get to bitch at her.

Prue: Yeah, neither did I.

(Leo unfreezes.)

Leo: We have to talk about it.

Prue: Leo, she left.

Phoebe: Yeah, so now I get to bitch at you. Listen, the next time you take my sister someplace, please, call and let us know that you got their safely, okay. I don't care if it's up there--

Prue: Okay, oh, shh. Leo, uh, can you do me a favour and just go find out everything you can on guardians. They are demons. Okay, thank you, bye.

(Leo orbs out.)

Phoebe: Excuse me, but I have issues.

Prue: Yes, I know, so do I, but Leo looked pretty beaten up already.

Phoebe: Yeah, you're right, which is why I'm now gonna go kick Piper's ass.

(She grabs the car keys and heads towards the door.)

Prue: Oh, oh!

(Prue closes the front door using her powers.)

Phoebe: Okay, we have had this conversation. You are not allowed to use your active power on me until I have an active power to use on you, remember?

Prue: I know, and I'm sorry, alright. But if anybody's gonna talk to Piper it should be me, okay. Cool our heads and all. Besides, shouldn't you be at class?

(Prue takes the keys off of Phoebe and leaves.)

[Scene: P3. Prue is walking down the stairs.]

Prue: Piper?

(Piper walks in holding a notebook.)

Piper: This is really weird. My supplies are, like, gone. There's no booze, there's no mineral water and we're even out of pretzels. Plus the books are all messed up. How did this happen in one lousy day?

Prue: One day? You're kidding, right? Piper, you have been gone for one month.

Piper: What are you talking about?

Prue: Here. (She picks up a newspaper off of the bench.) Check the date. (She does so.)

Piper: October? It's October? How is this possible? I guess time moves a little bit differently up there.

Prue: Yeah, well, it doesn't keep your head from being bitten off down here.

Piper: Are you talking about demons?

Prue: Oh, no, something so much worse than demons. Sisters. Especially Phoebe. We thought that you had abandoned us.

Piper: That's ridiculous. I would never abandon you guys. If I had known I was gone this long I would've called or orbed or somehow let you know I was okay.

Prue: Okay, why didn't Leo?

Piper: Leo was battling demons of his own. Wait a minute, what's today? There's a band. The-the-the Barenaked Ladies are playing here tomorrow. Didn't anybody bother to call them?

Prue: I-I don't really think that Phoebe knew. (Piper picks up the phone but Prue puts it back on its cradle.) Hey, you know what? Piper, can we just talk about what happened up there first?

Piper: Sure, uh, unfortunately the longer I'm back, the fuzzier it all seems to get. I think they do that on purpose, they're very big on mystery.

Prue: Okay, do you remember anything?

Piper: Just feelings mostly. Good ones. Peaceful and whole and then it all went to crap when they said Leo and I had to stop seeing each other or else.

Prue: Or else what?

Piper: Or else they'd reassign him and we'd never see each other again. Just because it didn't work out with mum and her Whitelighter, I don't understand why I'm being punished.

Prue: I'm sure that you guys will figure out a way around this. Come here. (They hug.) Leo would never let you go without a fight, you know that.

Piper: But what if he doesn't have a choice?

[Scene: College grounds. Phoebe's walking along the path. Cole sneaks up behind her and taps her on the shoulder. Phoebe spins around a does a high kick.]

Phoebe: Hi-yah! (Cole grabs her leg before it hits him.) Cole!

Cole: Hi, how's it going?

Phoebe: (embarrassed) Oh, (laughs) wow, is this embarrassing. Uh, I-I-I'm...

Cole: It's okay, I'm okay. Nice calf.

Phoebe: Oh, thanks. Can I have it back?

Cole: Sure. Sure.

(He lets go of her leg.)

Phoebe: Okay. (She laughs.) Uh, how did you find me?

Cole: Told you I was good at what I do. Although you probably wouldn't think so after my performance in court.

Phoebe: No, I thought you were amazing. It's just you were up against a, uh, an unfair Judge.

Cole: Free Willy, he's got that reputation. Still, I know I didn't put on my best case, that's why I'm here to see if you can help me do a better job.

Phoebe: How?

Cole: I don't know, you tell me. Look, Phoebe, I may not be the greatest prosecutor but I've got good instincts, I can sense things about people, things they might not even want me to know.

Phoebe: And what do you sense about me?

Cole: That you're struggling with the truth. That you're a good person who wants to do the right thing here but for whatever reason you can't. How am I doing so far?

Phoebe: Hung jury, mistrial.

Cole: If you think of anything, (he sticks his card in between the pages of a book she's holding) please call me. Home number's on the back. Bye.

(He turns and walks away. Phoebe checks out his butt. She pulls his card out of the book and has a premonition. In the premonition, Emilio has carved an inverted triangle on Cole's forehead.)

Phoebe: Oh no.

Commercial Break

[Scene: P3. Phoebe is running down the stairs.]

Phoebe: (to herself) I have got to get a cell phone. Prue, I had a premonition of Emilio carving that rune into Cole's forehead.

Prue: Did you see where it happens?

Phoebe: No, just some parking lot somewhere.

Piper: Who's Cole? Wh-what did you do to your hair?

Phoebe: I'm sorry, do I know you?

Prue: Okay, Phoebe, now is not the time. Are you sure?

Phoebe: Yeah, positive. Although, now that I think about it, it does seem weird because we vanquished the guardian.

Prue: Yeah, well, maybe he got another one.

(Piper opens her mouth ready to speak.)

Phoebe: What's a guardian you ask? Well, if you'd been around at all then you'd probably know, huh?

Prue: Alright, we'll fill you in on the phone and Leo's checking on them so you should get together with him and find out everything.

Phoebe: And no orbing.

(Prue and Phoebe leave the club.)

[Scene: Courthouse. Emilio walks into the judge's chambers.]

Emilio: I need another guardian.

Judge: What you need is to be more careful. I won't protect you again.

Emilio: I won't get caught again. I can take care of the witches, judge.

Judge: No, you can't, your mortal. But you can take care of the prosecutor. (A dagger magically appears in the judge's hand.) I don't want him to find out about you or me, understand?

[Scene: Police station. Cole is there talking to Darryl.]

Darryl: I wish I could help you, Turner, but I told you everything I can.

Cole: Call me Cole. After all, we're on the same side, aren't we?

Darryl: As often as cops and D.A's are, I guess.

Cole: Look Inspector, I'm just trying to do my job, okay. I let a murderer go free today and that doesn't sit well with me.

Darryl: Me neither.

Cole: Then help me do something about it. Help me find out what it is that I'm missing here.

Darryl: What your missing is a suspect, and if you let me do my job, then maybe I can help you find him, again. Now if you'll excuse me.

Cole: Why'd you call the Halliwell's last night?

Darryl: What?

Cole: While you were on stake out at 2:17am according to the phone company.

Darryl: You checked up on me?

Cole: Standard procedure, Inspector.

Darryl: Gee, and here I thought we were on the same side. I called because the sisters own a club. I thought they'd be interested in checking out the rave.

Cole: That was very nice of you.

Darryl: I'm a nice guy.

Cole: Yeah. (Cole's phone rings.) Turner.

Secretary: It's Phoebe Halliwell.

Cole: Oh, speak of the devil.

Secretary: Can I take a message?

Cole: No, please, put her through. Phoebe?

Phoebe: Cole, I've been trying to reach you.

Cole: Sorry, I was in a meeting with Inspector Morris actually. Wanna say hello?

[Cut to Prue and Phoebe in the car.]

Phoebe: Uh, no. (to Prue) He's at the police station.

Prue: 10-15 minutes at least.

Phoebe: Listen, Cole, I need to talk to you, it's really, really important.

(The phone begins to break up.)

Cole: Say again, I didn't catch that.

Phoebe: Cole? Uh, just-just stay where you are and I'll meet you there, okay?

Cole: We've got a bad line. Look, I'm running late for court, I'll call you from my car.

Phoebe: Cole? (She hangs up.) Damn it.

[Cut to the car park at the police station. Cole is walking towards his car. Emilio is hiding behind a pole, holding the dagger. He runs to another pole. Cole hears his footsteps and looks behind. Emilio hides behind a pole in front of him. Cole continues walking. As he walks past the pole, Emilio jumps out and stabs him in the back with the dagger. Cole falls to the ground. Prue and Phoebe arrive in the car and drives straight towards Emilio. He jumps out of the way. Prue and Phoebe get of out the car. Phoebe runs over to Emilio and he tries to stab her. She jumps up to dodge the attack and flies straight up into the air.]

Phoebe: Whoaaa! (She levitates in the air. Phoebe is in shock. Prue uses her power and Emilio lands on a car. Phoebe falls back onto the ground.) An active power. (The guardian rises out of Emilio.) Not that active. Prue!

Prue: Hey, catch.

(Prue uses her power ad the dagger flies straight into the Guardian's rune. The Guardian explodes in a ball of flame. Phoebe runs over to Cole.)

Phoebe: Cole, cole.

(Cole wakes up.)

Cole: Phoebe? What are you doing here? What happened?

Phoebe: I think I'm gonna plead the fifth on that one.

(They smile.)

[Scene: Manor. Piper is walking down the hallway. She hears Leo talking to himself in the bathroom. She stands next to the door and listens.]

Leo: I look at you and I think how lucky I am. I mean, I can't stop looking at you. You're my dream come true. You're my raison d'être.

[Cut to the bathroom. Leo is looking in the mirror.]

Leo: Every time I see you, I love you even more. You're so beautiful. You're so special. I can't imagine my life without you. (Piper walks in.) Piper!

Piper: Leo, who are you talking to?

Leo: Me? Uh, nobody, just myself, you know.

Piper: Yourself? You were telling yourself how much you love you?

Leo: No, of course not. Uh, I mean, it's, it's not like that at all. Um, let's go downstairs and I'll explain.

Piper: Actually, no, we don't have time. Uh, did you find out anything about the guardians?

Leo: Uh, no, I forgot.

Piper: You forgot? Leo, what's the matter? Why are you acting so weird?

Leo: Can we go downstairs please?

Piper: No, why?

Leo: Okay, fine, um, here's good. Um, I've been thinking a lot actually about our situation.

Piper: Leo...

Leo: No, no, just let me finish. Um, I think I've come up with a solution, a way for us to be together no matter what they say. (Leo gets down on one knee and Piper's eyes widen. He takes Piper's hand.) Will you marry me?

Commercial Break

[Scene: Manor. Continued from before. Piper is running down the stairs and Leo is following.]

Leo: Piper!

Piper: This is so not happening.

Leo: Listen to me, Piper, I told you, I thought this whole thing through.

Piper: Uh huh. Is that why you asked me to marry you in a toilet?

Leo: I tried to get you downstairs.

Piper: Well, I'm downstairs now and I still don't believe you're serious.

Leo: I am serious, Piper, dead serious.

Piper: Right. Dead is exactly what we're gonna be if they ever find out.

(Piper walks in the living room. Leo follows.)

Leo: Piper, would you... would you stop running away from me for just one minute and let me explain. (She stops and faces him.) If we got married... (she sighs) look, will you just hear me out please? If we got married, it would be a holy union, something I don't even think my bosses could break apart.

Piper: I don't understand.

Leo: It's really hard to explain. I-I don't really understand how it all works myself, but I know that there are different levels up there, a hierarchy. What I'm trying to say is that I think a holy union goes above their heads. It'd be like running an end run to my bosses bosses.

Piper: And end run?

Leo: Yeah. The only catch is that we would have to get married in secret because I think they only way they could hurt us if they found out before, so we just have to keep it quiet.

Piper: Elope?

Leo: Right.

Piper: So that they don't find out.

Leo: Exactly. (Pause) You hate the idea.

Piper: Well, it's not exactly Cinderella, is it? Leo, look, how do we know they don't know already? How do we know they're not listening right now?

Leo: They're not, believe me, they don't do that.

Piper: So then why does it have to be a secret?

Leo: Because if they ever did find out...

Piper: Leo, this isn't supposed to be this way. Marriage shouldn't be a solution to a problem or a band aid, it's supposed to be about love and about two people who love each other so much they want to spend the rest of their lives together.

Leo: That's what I want.

Piper: But that's not where this is coming from. It's a fix-it, I guess, but it's not about us or love or whether or not we're even ready to be married.

Leo: I came up with this whole idea because we love each other. It's all about our love. You know, we're meant to be together, Piper, you know that. You went to the future and you saw that we were married in it. That means that somehow they didn't stop us, somehow we found a way to be together and I think this is the way.

Piper: I don't know. Leo, I love you and I know I never wanna be without you, but... this just doesn't feel right. I mean, getting married in secret... It doesn't feel like a holy union to me. I'm sorry.

(Prue and Phoebe come home.)

Prue: Piper, Leo? (They walk in the living room.) Oh, hey, Leo, good. Uh, did you find out anything about the guardian?

Leo: Not yet.

Phoebe: Not yet? What do you mean not yet? (Piper leaves the room.) Piper.

Leo: I'll go see what I can find out.

(He orbs out.)

[Scene: Police station. In a room. Emilio and Darryl are there. Cole walks in.]

Cole: You get anything out of him?

Darryl: Nope, he's not talking.

Cole: Yeah? It seems to be an epidemic.

(Cole begins to walk over to Emilio but Darryl stops him.)

Darryl: Don't do anything stupid, Turner. You don't want to compromise the case.

Cole: What case? He's already gotten away with murder. You really think they're gonna nail him for hitting me over the head? (He walks over and sits on the end of the table.) How's it going? I'm gonna make you a deal, Emilio. One that, if you're smart you'll jump at. Obviously whoever's protecting you isn't gonna keep doing it for much longer. Especially since you keep screwing up and getting caught. So, you might wanna pay attention. I want you to give a message to your friend. Tell him I know he sent you after me and because of that I'm gonna personally bring him down.

Emilio: You don't scare me.

Cole: No? (He shakes his head. Cole bangs Emilio's head on the table and grabs his throat.) You have no idea who you're dealing with.

Darryl: What are you doing? Let him go.

(Darryl splits them up.)

Cole: See you in court.

(He leaves.)

[Scene: Manor. Piper's room. Piper is laying on the bed. Prue and Phoebe enter.]

Prue: Hey.

(They lay all over Piper.)

Phoebe: Do you want to be alone?

Piper: No. But it looks like I'm gonna be. Leo asked me to marry him.

Prue: That's great!

Piper: Yeah, except that I can't do it.

Phoebe: Oh, what do you mean you can't do it, Piper? You love him.

Piper: Of course I do, with all my heart but why's it got to be so complicated? Why can't I just be a normal person in love with a normal guy?

Prue: Does Leo think that getting married is the only way around them?

Piper: Yeah, but he's not even sure it's gonna work.

Phoebe: Yeah, but it might work. Piper, you and Leo are destined to be together. You guys have the kind of love that girls dream about. I know I dream about it, how about you?

Prue: All the time.

Phoebe: And it understand the risks but if you don't go for it, isn't it an even bigger risk?

(Leo orbs in.)

Prue: That was fast.

Phoebe: A little too fast.

Leo: Sorry, but they were very interested when I told them about the guardians. Apparently guardians help mortal criminals spread evil.

Prue: Yeah, we already know that. Skip ahead.

Leo: Well, they think that you've stumbled across some evil conspiracy in that court room. One where an upper level demon somehow assigns guardians to the criminals who are set free.

Phoebe: That makes sense. It explains why Emilio has two.

Prue: Yeah, the question is, who's the demon?

Piper: Didn't you say the public defender seems suspicious?

Prue: Yeah, but he's not exactly in his best position to be setting criminals free.

Phoebe: Yeah, but Free Willy is.

Piper: Who?

Phoebe: The judge. That would explain why he's got the highest release rate of anyone on the bench.

Leo: Still, you can't very well go vanquishing the judge without knowing for sure he's demonic.

Phoebe: Well, we better come up with a plan because Emilio gets arraigned in night court in, oh, an hour.

Prue: I've got an idea.

[Scene: Courthouse. Prue, Piper, Phoebe and Leo are walking down the corridor.]

Piper: Can't we just come up with a spell or something?

Prue: No, a spell could backfire on us.

Piper: So could this.

Prue: No, the worst that could happen is that it just doesn't work, but we have to flush the demon out somehow.

Phoebe: And since you can selectively freeze things, why not just the innocents?

Piper: Oh, maybe because I've never done it before.

Phoebe: Yeah, well, I've never levitated before.

Piper: You never what?

Prue: Look, Piper, just focus all of your energy on freezing the innocents, okay?

Piper: Okay. (to Phoebe) So why did you do that to your hair?

Phoebe: Because I wanted to change my luck.

Piper: Oh.

Phoebe: Scoot.

[Cut to inside the court room. Prue, Piper, Phoebe and Leo walk in.]

Alan: How many times is the prosecution gonna keep harassing my client, you honor? I mean, as far as I'm concerned, this has turned into nothing but a witch hunt.

Cole: If I may please court, have a minute to confer with the witnesses?

(Prue, Piper, Phoebe and Leo sit down next to Darryl.)

Judge: It's late, Mr. Turner. Either you have a case or you don't.

Cole: Very well. Uh, why would the defendant attack me if he was innocent of the prior charges?

Alan: There's no proof he's the one responsible for the attack.

Prue: (whispers) Now, Piper.

Cole: Then what was he doing in the police parking lot? And why did myself and two eye witnesses...

Alan: You mean, the same two eye witnesses that were here before?

Phoebe: Piper...

Piper: Alright.

Alan: And what were they doing there? (Piper tries to freeze the room but nothing happens.) I mean, how is it that they just magically be at every crime scene?

Prue: Try it again.

Piper: I am trying.

Cole: Objection, your hon--

(Piper freezes the room and only Cole, Leo and Darryl freeze.)

Phoebe: It worked.

Judge: Overruled.

Prue: It's the judge.

Alan: You honor, I move for this case to be dismissed.

Phoebe: And the P.D.

(They look around and Emilio and the security guards haven't freezed.)

Piper: It's everybody.

Prue: Oh!

Judge: Kill them.

Prue: Oh!

Phoebe: What do we do?

Prue: Oh! Oh! We run.

(They run into another room. The judge turns into a demon.)

Commercial Break

[Scene: Continued from before. Prue, Piper and Phoebe run into a room and lock the door.]

Phoebe: Okay, does anybody have any brilliant ideas?

Prue: Ah, can't you just freeze them?

Piper: No, once they're immune to it they stay that way. That's why it's called immunity.

Phoebe: Great. (Everyone outside tries to bang down the door.) Okay, this was all your idea, you know.

Prue: Okay, well, so sue me.

[Cut to outside.]

Judge: Stand back.

(Everyone moves out of the way. A fireball flies out of the judge's hand and hits the door.)

[Cut back to the room.]

Prue: Ah, any mass vanquishing spells?

Phoebe: You're the one that's been studying the book.

Prue: Why are you picking on me?

Phoebe: Because I'm scared and we're outnumbered.

Piper: Okay, but we can't stay in this room for the rest of our lives.

(The judge throws another fireball.)

Prue: Oh! (Everyone outside continues to bang on the door.) Alright, the best defence is a good offence. Are you ready?

Piper: No.

Prue: Yeah, you're ready.

Piper: No, no.

Prue: On three. One, two, (to Phoebe) don't hold my hand. One, two, three.

(Prue uses her power and the door flies open knocking everyone behind it out of the way. Alan points a gun at Prue and she uses her power on him. A security guard grabs her from behind. Phoebe does some of her karate moves on some woman. Emilio heads straight for Piper holding a knife and she continually tries to freeze him. She picks up a baton off of the floor and blocks his attack. Prue breaks away from the guards grip and kicks one in the stomach. The judge throws a fireball straight at Prue and her power reflects it. They continue fighting everyone until they are all unconscious.)

Prue: Okay, nicely done.

Phoebe: You too.

Piper: Wait a minute, if they're demons where are they're powers?

Judge: Come to me.

(The guardians rise out of the people and follow the judge into the chambers.)

Prue: Guardians. They're not demons, they're just protected by them. Come on.

(They run towards the chambers. Cole moves. He wasn't frozen. He disappears.)

[Cut to the judge's chambers. The judge is there. Cole appears.]

Judge: What the hell?

Cole: Thanks, I'll take it from here.

(Cole flicks his hand and the judge is engulfed in flames. Cole disappear and reappears back outside. He gets back into his frozen position. Prue, Piper and Phoebe walk into the chambers. The judge burns and disappears.)

Piper: Okay, how did that happen?

Prue: Good question, but we're not alone.

Phoebe: We better get back before Cole unfreezes.

(They walk back outside.)

Piper: How are we gonna explain all this to him?

Phoebe: Uhh... (Phoebe picks up a baton and stands behind Cole.) I am so sorry. (She hits him over the head and he falls down. Piper unfreezes Leo and Darryl.) Oh, Cole, Cole. (He sits up.) Are you okay?

Cole: Uh, yeah, I think so. (He rubs his head.) What happened?

Phoebe: Aren't you getting tired of asking me that? (He stares at her.) Um, well, Emilio went nuts and he tried to escape and then all the court room people tried to help him...

Prue: Yeah, thank God for Darryl.

Piper: Yep, saved the day.

Cole: (confused) What?

Phoebe: Something good happened. Can't you just accept that?

Cole: It's not in my nature.

[Scene: P3. The Barenaked Ladies are playing. Piper's at the bar serving drinks. Prue and Phoebe walk up.]

Phoebe: You've been gone for two days and you get the Barenaked Ladies? How?

Piper: Oh, actually, I just made a couple of phone calls.

Phoebe: And I can't even get Barry Manilow on the phone. I'm sorry I screwed up your club.

Piper: Oh, Phoebe, don't. I owe you guys an apology and thanks for covering my butt.

Phoebe: Ah, not a problem. I didn't even really notice that you were gone actually.

Prue: Liar.

Phoebe: Yeah, I've been doing a lot of that lately. Unfortunately, especially to Cole. But hopefully I won't have to lie to him anymore.

Prue: Yeah, well, something tells me he's not going anywhere anytime soon.

Phoebe: No complaints here.

Piper: Uh, one over here. Hottie that he is, he is an Assistant D.A., which makes him somewhat a threat to us.

Phoebe: Yeah, but at least he's one of the good guys.

(Leo walks in.)

Prue: Speaking of the good guys...

Phoebe: Uh, so have you had a change of heart?

Piper: Actually, no. (She walks over to Leo.) Hi.

Leo: Hi. Piper, maybe it was a mistake...

Piper: Wait, Leo, me first. I've been thinking a lot about our situation and you asking me and I didn't want to just dismiss it without thinking it through. Um, last night in the court room, I was actually scared. For a minute there I thought I wasn't gonna make it, that that was it, and that's when I realised that I don't wanna die without ever having being married to you. The answer is yes, Leo, I would love to marry you.

Leo: Yeah?

Piper: Yeah.

Leo: Yeah?

(They laugh.)

Piper: Yeah.

(They hug. They kiss and the scene fades out.)

End